FLY BAIT

I am always amazed by what I learn from noisy pubs and eateries. Unlike those up-market establishments where you have to cover your mouth just to burp then wear this apologetic face, it is all systems go in these places. You can burp from whatever orifice you wish and no one will notice.

In these places you will meet all the loudmouths who are more than willing to demonstrate to you that lighting a candle will banish those pesky flies from your table as long as they know that the candle is on the house. Only problem is the flies will only take a hike when you wave your hand or blow out the candle in exasperation then moments later they land again with a vengeance!

I was therefore skeptical when the waiter calmly came to our table, wiped it clean then sprinkled some pellets at one corner of the table. He then poured some water on the pellets and walked off to his business!

When I protested he turned and lamented that some people are just dumb and can't know when someone is trying to help them. I told him he was just stupid and what does he know, at which point he wiggled his bottle opener at me and told me to shut up!

Soon flies started landing on the pellets in droves and I was preparing to shout an insult at him when strange things started happening. One by one the flies started dancing on the table!

What kind of spirits had this crazy waiter summoned on our table! I put on my spectacles and squinted hard at the flies. In johny's name, what the hell... one by one the flies started falling on their backs!

This was too much. I called for the satchet and quickly read AGITA FLY BAIT from Norvatis active ingredient- Thiomethoxam 1%. Well, knock my head.

I poked one of the flies with a toothpick and it was dead. Dead as a dodo and the rest of the gang were still dancing and dropping fast. Soon the whole floor and tables were covered with dead flies and the cocky waiter just had to shush me as he wiped them off!

Later on, while doing my rounds on the internet, I followed up this lead and let's just say, i'm buying that stupid waiter a beer next time.

That stuff works.